November 2011
1 post
Specificity
I think this perfume reviewer on makeupalley.com has lost it:
“this one is- having sex on animal skin on the floor, wearing the most expensive silky underware, golden bracelets and extraordinary voluptous red Chanel rouge….
with a lover who is married with equally gorgeous women, but lacks excitement that he seeks in someone else. that’s exactly the kind of atmosphere this...
October 2011
2 posts
1 tag
August 2011
1 post
June 2011
7 posts
http://awkwardstockphotos.com/ →
If you want to see some very truly bizarre images, I highly recommend Awkward Stock Photos. It will fill you with wonderment as to what the hell is going on here.
May 2011
5 posts
Work out songs
Does anyone have recommendations for good work out songs? These are my favorites.
Any and all songs by Girl Talk! It’s seriously the best music to work out to, especially if you have a short attention span.
Others:
http://www.californiaparrotproject.org/ →
Did you know that there are wild parrots living in Los Angeles? Did you also know that parrots are very loud and annoying animals? We also have, no kidding, a flock of ducks living in our neighborhood. You would not believe the amount of squawking that goes on around here at dusk.
April 2011
1 post
Today I lost something valuable. It makes me sad. I’m sure there are lessons to be learned here, like how I’m a bad person and don’t deserve nice things.
February 2011
2 posts
December 2010
2 posts
Living with an animal is like hosting a retarded foreign exchange student.
November 2010
18 posts
Sorry in advance
You can probably expect more posts from me this week, because I’m at home sick. I have shingles. You get shingles when the chickenpox virus, which remains dormant inside your body for decades, decides to suddenly come back and torture you. Which isn’t creepy at all….JUST KIDDING IT’S TOTALLY FUCKIN CREEPY. Like, what else is hidden inside me from childhood that is just...
Who doesn't like Tron jackets?
http://www.hulu.com/watch/193086/saturday-night-live-arcade-fire-sprawl-ii
I really liked Arcade Fire on SNL. Even if Regine is maybe a little bit better at twirling than singing. Sprawl II is still a killer fucking jam.
“Love in an open book to a verse of your bad poetry……and this is...”
– LCD Soundsytem
Found a piece of cheese that I had dropped between the seats of my car. I am Liz Lemon IRL.
In my fantasy life, it’s really easy to be a musician, and everyone is really interested in the songs I write about my daily life. My next killer jam is called “Heatin up a Burrito.”
August 2010
2 posts
It's all downhill from here.
For my entire life, I wanted to be older. I’ve always felt much older than my actual age.
Until one day when I didn’t.
I was reading a magazine article about some uber-accomplished 26 year old and I thought “Oh, she’s the same age as m-OH SHIT I’M TWENTY *SEVEN*!” It is never good to be surprised by your own age.
I started having a “Once in a...
May 2010
3 posts
Dear Tracy Anderson:
I saw that you opened a gym in my neighborhood! I wondered how much it would cost, so I visited your website, www.tracyandersonmethod.com. Your website didn’t mention the cost, so I googled around. Apparently it costs around $900 a month.
Fuck you, Tracy Anderson.
I don’t care that you trained Madonna. I wouldn’t care if you trained Jesus. There is no...
tumblr.
I think I’m going to start doing this again.
August 2009
3 posts
My favorite advertising slogan is the one for Miller High Life - “The Champagne of Beers.” What this says to me is that this product is by far the classiest in a category that is not classy at all. It’s like saying Spam is the caviar of meats in a can. Motley Crue is the Radiohead of hair metal. Miley Cyrus is the Denzel Washington of Disney. It doesn’t make it less...
Here’s an embarrassing fact about me: I really like a show on the Science Channel called Mantracker. If you haven’t seen it, the premise is really simple. It’s basically just two old dudes on a horse. In every episode, they chase two annoying people through the wilderness. It’s like a glorified hide and seek. So fucking primal!
May 2009
1 post
“If Benjamin were an ice cream flavor, he’d be pralines and dick.”
– Wayne’s World
March 2009
3 posts
To-Don't List
To-do lists are for suckers. Try making a list of all the things you don’t want to do today. It will make you feel productive.
To-Don’t:
-die
-get involved in a Ponzi Scheme
-murder someone
-fall down
-contract an STD
- watch ‘Bride Wars’
Congratulations, Megan. Looks like today was a success!